ABOUT This Undeserved Life

You know when something bad happens in your life—you discover you're infertile, you miscarry, you experience birth trauma, you're fired traumatically—turning your world upside down, and someone comes along and tries to make you feel better... but instead, you feel worse?

Maybe they say “This was God’s plan,” “It was meant to be,” “You’ll learn something from this,” or “You’ll be fine eventually.”

What they’re really doing is stripping you of your permission to grieve.

In This Undeserved Life, you will not only find permission, you will encounter the invitation to grieve loss. All loss. You will discover that loss is unquantifiable.

My hope is that you’ll read these pages curled up with a cup of something warm and comforting, you’ll allow your heart to experience big emotions, and you end up discovering an unexpected joy.

This is the story of how I surrendered my sorrow by grabbing ahold of it, leading me to unearth an immense amount of grace.

I'm a Jesus girl. My sorrow created in me an undeniable hunger for Him; I found Him sitting with me in my darkest nightmares.

This is the story of me going from asking, "What did I do to deserve all this pain and sorrow?" to asking, "What did I do to deserve all this grace and goodness?"


  • Actionable grief workbook prompts: a revised version of Wholeness Despite the Brokenness

  • Further reading and resources for adoption and justice

if you preorder

SEND ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT LINE "PREORDERED, SEND ME MY GOODIES" Please include your mailing address and if you're able, forward me your reciept. When the goodies are all pulled together, I'll do that!


*Preorder This Undeserved Life for a discounted price, whether kindle or print. The prices will raise September 24th. Currently you can purchase a print book for $9.99 and a kindle book for $6.99.

When can I get This Undeserved Life?

This Undeserved Life will be available September 18, 2017 in print, audio (my voice!), and ebook.

Please add yourself to my email list! 

IMPORTANT: After you enter your email here, you'll receive an email, and need to click "confirm." Then be sure to whitelist my email so it doesn't get in spam folders! Directions will be sent to you.

When you join my list, you'll immediately download two free ebooks (one is my grief workbook which will be a bonus chapter in This Undeserved Life!) and a pretty print.

Image by Kersten Green Photography from Portland, OR.

Image by Kersten Green Photography from Portland, OR.

Join my launch team!

Are you excited about the message in This Undeserved Life? Join my launch team and help me spread the word! I have big goals for this book and need all the help I can get.

Share one of these images with your social media world, plan your own book club, help me spread the word about this necessary book.

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Praises from real life people

A note from Jessica Satterfield, Adoptive Mom, Writer, and Speaker at www.GraceWhileWeWait.com

Natalie’s words in this book shine light on the darkest, unseen places of the soul. Her raw and honest words extend an invitation for us to give our grief, found in each of our stories, the space and time to heal. These words will speak to deep places in you, I know they have in me.

A note from Seth King, Refugee Case Manager at Lutheran Community Services

Sometimes it seems like the world of writing where real life and Jesus collide is just for women. It would be easy to put this text in that same vein. It is more than that though. As a foster dad figuring out how to love and raise kids that aren’t like me, this book spoke to my heart. As someone trying to figure out what it means to love The Church when hurt is everywhere, this book spoke to my heart. As a guy trying to figure out the meaning of life and birth for the women all around me, this book taught me pieces I never before understood. Natalie is exactly what she seems like. Full of hope and kindness even in the darkest of places. There is nothing false or fake hiding between the lines. Grateful for the words of this book.

A note from Adoption.com:

Some words of advice when you read Natalie Brenner’s This Undeserved Life: clear your schedule because you won’t want to put it down; start a book club because you are going to want to talk about this book with everyone you know; and try not to bawl after reading because you realize how painful, incredible, stressful, and magical life can be.
Natalie weaves a story about grief, adoption, infertility, heartache, love, and more. Page after page you will be amazed at how one person finds her way through trauma and pain to a beautiful, imperfectly wonderful life.

This is a must-read for anyone looking to find more purpose, beauty, and life.

A note from Diane Comer, Writer at He Speaks In The Silence and Author of Finding Intimacy with God by Learning To Listen:

I’d love to recommend your living-wisdom for others as they walk through hardship.

A note from Lorna Bailey, Executive Assistant to Jeff Goins

...crying because I experienced similar leadership in [city] and it was a relief for someone to put words to the feeling and validate that what I had felt for the past few years wasn’t me being crazy.

A quick note from Jessica Satterfield, Writer at Grace While We Wait:

Girl, only into chapter two...crying. So good.

A note from Misha Klein, Boys and Girls Club Branch Director

Natalie has taken the her story and the topics of loss and grief and hurt and has created something absolutely beautiful! The whole time I was reading, names of friends and family who would benefit from reading this book kept popping into my head. This Undeserved Life will speak to anyone who has ever faced loss or grief or conflict that made them feel isolated and alone—or rather, God will speak to them through this book.

Natalie is a gifted writer and is faithfully using that gift for His glory. She has a story that SO MANY people will relate to for so many reasons.

A note from Stacey Stark, Writer at Adoption.com and The Starks Adopt:

I laid in bed reading last night and didn’t want to put it down. I’m loving this book. Tons of people are going to relate to this. The idea that we need to work, sacrifice, and paste on a smile, as if anything less isn’t consistent with our faith. It’s so good, everything is so vivid to me.

Pain and loss are unavoidable, but Natalie’s words in This Undeserved Life will refresh your soul. Her encouragement to quit pretending and look our grief and pain in the face is a message that will be helpful to so many. Whether you have or are presently dealing with everyday disappointment or tragic loss, this is a message we all need to hear—that we will still find Jesus in the midst of our deepest pain. 

My manuscript is currently in the hands of Mike Berry from Confessions of An Adoptive Parent, Diane Comer from He Speaks In The Silence, Jessica Satterfield from Grace While We Wait, Lorna Bailey, and Jeff Goins

I cannot wait to release this book into a world that needs it! I have loved the process of writing this book and am honored to have the freedom to do so. What a gift. This is my labor of love to the fractured-hearted.